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Part of USS Healdsburg: Crew Assemble!

There’s a little Ferengi in the air

Published on August 22, 2024
USS Healdsburg - Captain's quarters.
August 2401
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“Nope not there…” the Starfleet uniformed Ferengi said to herself. “Not there either… is it here?” she went to stand up and smacked her head on console above her. “I suppose that’s why they call me Tally Whack.” she said looking out the window at Starbase Bravo.

“Stop or I’ll shoot!” Walton ordered. 

“I heard you clomping a mile a way, I am Lt. Talat Nimora, your operations officer, I am looking for something.” Talat said.

“I don’t believe you! There is only one Ferengi in Starfleet!” Warren said, “Turn around.”

With her hands up Talat complied and than it hit her, “Replicator!”

“What?”

“The Replicator would be a sub system which they are working right now that these quarters can do with out until the repair order got filled… hmmm, than so would the sonic shower.” she walked towards the head. 

“I said STOP!” Warren reminded the Ferengi growing more aggravated by the second.

Talat stopped in her tracks, “You’re right. Sorry Ma’am.”

“Thank you.” the human said. going to the console she began to work it, sure enough the Ferengi was right. “Oh, I stand corrected. Now what are you doing in here? Can I help you?”

“I was trying to explain… I need a tertiary joint of the…” the Ferengi was interupted.

“Without the technocrap.” Warren motioned with her phaser. 

“How technoey are you? Press-press boom? Rub up and down to login to your terminal?” Talat inquired.

“I am not that bad.” Elisabeth smiled a bit.

“Those were jokes, sheesh your wound tighter than a first year cadet.” Talat compared the two.

“I can shoot you.” Elisabeth said white knuckling the grip of her phaser.

“But there’s paperwork darling, anyhoo, I need something to make the computers in my office go brr.” the operations officer said. 

“And you say you can take it from the Sonic Shower?” Lt. Warren said.

“Yes M’am.” Talat toothily grinned. 

“Do it. I’ll file the engineering request…” Lt. Warren confided. 

“Oh about Engineering, tell Grieves I’m sorry for the fire.” Talat said. 
 

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